


War Death and Misfortune

by Ally_Kats



Category: DSMP - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Gods & Goddesses, Angst, Blood, Doomsday, Gods, Other, Ranboo-centric, Violence, follows cannon, may or may not continue, minor explosions, tags are liable to change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-19
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-15 05:41:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29554395
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ally_Kats/pseuds/Ally_Kats
Summary: Misfortune wasn't uncommon in the world. Especially during the fall of L'manburg. Ranboo is a new god, filling the role of a recently deceased god. He is Misfortune, and he follows Death into the Underworld after his city is gone.Perhaps he'll find home here.~~~~~A fic centered around Ranboo. Mainly about my take on a Gods AU. Follows the cannon events closely, they just all happen to be gods this time around.
Relationships: Ranboo & Technoblade & Phil Watson (Video Blogging RPF)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 164





	1. So I've Recently Become Homeless...

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter is more of a summary/exposition on what happened with L'manburg in this AU. There's not really dialogue, but if I go on from here, there will be.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ranboo thinks about the events of Doomsday while in his new home, the underworld. It's a lot to take in.

The underworld was colder than Ranboo had expected.

Every time he came here he had that thought. He had imagined the Underworld as firey, filled with brick and flames. A place where souls would be warm, or burn eternally. Instead he found a snow and ice covered landscape, tall pine trees extending into a false night sky and unending constellations. Mountain ranges and floating islands went on for miles, surrounding a house, the only building in this place.

~~It felt like a home.~~

Ranboo had been here before, once to see Tommy, and once to find War. Now he followed Death- No, not Death, Phil- here.

Phil pointed out an area, a space at the bottom of a hill, for him to inhabit. Ranboo had thanked him and gone to collect what he needed. A home made by his own hands, a place where he could finally rest. It would keep him busy at the very least. He may not have magic to help him build a shelter, but he did have his hands. Ranboo had survived as a mortal for many years on his own, he could make himself a home.

_"I could live in a dirt shack and call it my home!"_

Ranboo pushed the memory away. It was too much to process too soon.

Spirits wandered by often, but Ranboo couldn't hear them speak. Some would look lost, cold, wandering about in rags. Others looked curious, watching him with glowing eyes as he worked. In the distance, there were soulfire camps, surrounded by the spirits.

His home wasn't much, a simple wooden roof, propped up on long, thin pieces of wood. It leaned against the side of the mountain, buried into the snow. Ranboo finished it off by making the inside habitable, clearing out the snow and creating a campfire, though it doesn't do him much good. It's not as easy at it looks, creating warmth in a barren and cold place like this.

A memory, fleeting and distant, passed through Ranboo's mind. Tommy, sitting, laughing in the cold as his magic melted the snow around War's house. His eyes were brighter here than they ever had been while he was in exile.

Tommy wasn't welcome here anymore.

Ranboo knew why, he'd seen it happen. Moreover, he'd stood stock still and watched. He had seen as Tommy had screamed and yelled at Tubbo, before stopping with a horrified face. He had looked on as Techno, enraged, demanded back his axe, and Tommy had declared himself worthy.

Ranboo had done nothing.

Tommy, meanwhile, was always bright. He could melt anything, even the coldest of hearts. Though Ranboo could find his light quite blinding at times, he now found himself wishing for a bit of that warmth. It was so cold here, the air and harsh winds not even relenting for a god.

He was still getting used to that title. Ranboo never saw himself as a god, never actually sought out that power. He didn't have a choice in the matter, it seemed, as he was forced into the position. The very next day was no better, forced into a strange world of politics and stress. Ranboo was exhausted.

A movement at the cabin caught his eye and he looked up. He expected to see more spirits, perhaps knocking at War and Death's door. Instead he found himself staring at War himself.

War was currently covered in blood, which was to be expected from the god who destroyed an entire city that day. Blood stained his clothes. It muddled the white fur collar of his cloak, smudged across crown he wore, and dripped from his hands.

The only thing not touched was his mask. He wore a boar's skull, his symbol, eyes peering out from the dark sockets. Not a single drop of blood had touched the mask. Ranboo wondered if that was accidental or if War was just talented enough to avoid such a thing.

War's head swiveled in his direction and they locked eyes. Ranboo froze, feeling as if he had been turned to stone by the gaze. His heart pounded in his ears.

Death had given him permission to live here, but would War? This was his home too. Had Ranboo made his final mistake? Oh, he was so dead-

Then War broke eye contact, and shook his head. He ignored Ranboo and walked inside of his house. The door shut behind him.

Ranboo didn't move for a minute longer and it took him a moment after that to breath freely again.

It was said that those of War's followers whom died in battle had a connection to the god. It was said War could hear them and they drove his blood lust ever further. His power was unmatched, save for the only other god of War. The bloody deaths of his enemies were written in legends. War has a bloody trail behind him.

In short, War terrified Ranboo, simply by reputation alone.

It it wasn't just the reputation, the supplies inside the house were intimidating. Death- Philza, had let him take materials for his home. Ranboo had seen weapons, supplies, Golden Apples, and more. War was never idle, always preparing for something. It was no wonder L'manburg had fallen, they were woefully under prepared.

They had less fallen and more crumbled, hadn't they?

Ranboo's treacherous mind latched onto that thought. It had only been hours prior when he had seen his friend's home blown to smithereens. He still wanted to forget the experience as quickly as possible.

But there had been monsters around the explosion, there had been wild animals biting and yelling, there was death and destruction everywhere. Ranboo had seen his first temple fall. He had seen the faces of his fellow gods twist in anger, in betrayal, in mourning. All the while they hadn't looked at the people that had once worshiped them. The gods hadn't seen them die.

Ranboo was lucky, he had evacuated many of his followers before hand. But there were still too many who stayed. There was a loss of life. He mourned that more than any temple, any building or monument in L'manburg.

They were Gods playing among mortals. Quite literally.

The destruction of L'manburg had nothing to do with the worshippers who had lived there. It had to do with revenge, anger, hatred. The gods had bickered among themselves and laid waste to the city of a thousand or so.

War and Tommy had screamed at each other, angry at the other for betraying them. Death had met with the spirit of his son, the late god of misfortune. War's monsters ravaged the city while the other god of war blasted the center, creating a deep and endless pit where laughter once stood. Many mortals attempted to fight, but it was all for naught.

Ranboo hadn't wanted them to die.

That wasn't to say it wasn't for the better. L'manburg had always been to cramped for him. The cults of mortals, the strict rules, the harsh politics, it was too much too fast. He was thrown into the deep end and expected to know how to swim. Cities were always too crowded for him.

The misfortunate mortals died that day... very few gods understood the tragedy of the situation. Good people, bad people, all happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time. It wasn't their fault, really.

It was the Gods fault.

~~It was all his fault.~~

Ranboo sat in his small shack, around his campfire. He shook the thoughts from his head, though they seemed to want to stick to his mind. It was over now, he wasn't a part of it anymore. He didn't want to be a part of it ever again. The Underworld was the last place anyone would look for him, he would be safe here.

This place felt like more of a home than L'manburg had ever been.


	2. The New Neighbor Is A Little Weird

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Technoblade finds himself interacting with his new neighbor in the Underworld. It goes better than expected.

Technoblade didn't ask for much.

The most he had wanted was to be good at stabbing people, farming potatoes, and whatever else he took a fancy too. He had interests, like anyone else, and all he wanted was to pursue them. If people recognized the hard work and training he had put into them, then it was all for the better right?

Right.

Well the universe seemed to have a different opinion, one Techno did not appreciate.

Not only had he jumped into a war, become a god (against his will if he may add), and be betrayed by his brothers in arms, he now had to watch over this new guy while Phil was out! Techno was NOT a baby sitter!

The god in question wasn't a hassle to watch over. Techno just had to check out his window every night to make sure he wasn't dead yet. Ranboo didn't do much at first, simply built a small shack and collected supplies, probably recovering from the destruction of L'manburg.

A few times, later in the week, Ranboo would leave the underworld and stay out for hours. Techno didn't stop him, seeing as Ranboo always came back unharmed. Techno really couldn't be bothered to stalk his neighbor.

He didn't know the newer god that well. Techno had heard some rumors, true, but his interactions with this one were slim to none.

Sure, he'd given Ranboo his book back during the takedown of L'manburg, but it was only fair seeing as Ranboo had given him back his armor! They owed each other nothing now. They should have nothing to do with each other anymore. It was a quid pro quo.

Which of _course_ meant Ranboo had been invited to stay near the house. Somehow.

Techno wasn't opposed to the idea. From what he had heard, Ranboo had popped off on a rant about how L'manburg was leading people to ruin. The few times they HAD interacted it had been positive, save for Techno's execution. Ranboo had the makings of a good neutral neighbor, or an ally if things worked out well.

Techno hadn't expected for things to be as awkward as they were.

It seemed both of them were introverts, which was unfortunate in the "small talk" department. Techno didn't mind... But he had no idea what he'd say to Ranboo if Ranboo ever struck up a conversation. Luckily the most they ever interacted was Ranboo sheepishly asking for a few extra logs for his campfire.

Techno had decided to start naming his dogs, taking suggestions from 'Chat', the chatter in his head, to do so. Chat was quieter in the underworld, but still there. It was in the middle of this chore, when The Incident happened.

Now there were a few Incidents that would occur throughout Ranboo's stay. But this was the first one.

Ranboo had approached him and the dreaded small talk began. It was... Not as bad as Techno had feared, much better than awkward silence. Ranboo had a good sense of humor, a few quips of his own, though he seemed slightly nervous. It made sense, Technoblade had destroyed his entire nation-

"Actually... That reminds me, I have a present for uh... For you."

Techno perked up at that, attention shifting "Oh?"

"Yeah cause... I know every single time I've had to come here I have to give you something?" Ranboo said sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck.

Techno nodded, "It's true it's true."

"And now I'm going to be here for..." He glanced towards his pitiful shack, "probably a little bit longer than any of the other times."

"Nice..."

"So ah... I made you this, here."

Ranboo unhooked an axe from his belt, handing it to Techno. It weighed heavy in his palm, but it wasn't unbalanced. The axe's handle was smooth, polished, with a leather grip. The metal was black, though not colored by soot. The axe heads, one either side, were free of any scratches or nicks, though a few area looked like they needed to be polished. The edge of the blade was sharpened, unscratched.

Techno froze, staring at the axe.

~~_A present._ ~~

It was evident there was a lot of time and care put into this weapon. The pommel had been carved by hand, this entire _thing_ had to have been hand crafted. It wasn't like any other axe he had seen. Techno knew how much time it had taken him to make the Axe of Peace. While this one wasn't perfected like that his had been, there was obviously an effort.

~~_It was valuable._ ~~

"Cause I hear you kinda... Lost yours... When you blew up L'manburg..." Ranboo continued.

"It's true..." Techno mumbled, but he wasn't really paying attention anymore.

Ranboo. Was giving this. To him. The God of War. Ranboo was giving away a very powerful weapon. As a present.

Maybe the reason he couldn't respond was due to having lived with Tommy for so long. The Sun God stole every valuable resource he could get his hands on. He left chests disorganized and acted as if this was his home, not Technoblade's. Maybe it was Pogtopia, how they had armored themselves with what took Technoblade hours to make, taken his food, his cows, his resources and turned on him.

Maybe it was something else entirely, but Technoblade wasn't used to getting gifts.

"Uh..." Ranboo was looking at him and he almost reminded Techno of a wild animal ready to bolt. 

"..Well..." Techno cleared his throat, "I-I guess this this gift is sorta ok- ah..."

He was stumbling over his words, mind blanking as he reached for something to say that didn't sound incredibly sappy. Something to take the edge off this extremely touching moment but something that wouldn't scare Ranboo off.

"..I ah... I suppose I could- er could.. Uh...find a use for this." He stammered, "I'm not..."

Ranboo's fear seem to disappear, a small smile replacing it, "Mhm... Maybe..."

"Aaaaaahhhhh...." Techno had to turn away, quickly striding twoards his porch. He did not want Ranboo seeing his face as he attempted to regain his composure, "...my heart isn't warmed at all, ok ok."

He made it to the top of the porch-and didn't know where to go from here. He couldn't hide himself in his house, could he?

Techno turned back to Ranboo, who hadn't moved and was wearing an amused, if confused, expression. The god of war huffed and crossed his arms, attempting to squint angrily at the other god.

"Just cause you gave me this axe it doesn't mean we're _friends_ now, ok. Don't get any _ideas_." He had a reputation to uphold, damn it!

Ranboo took a step back, "Uh, yeah, no it's just-"

"I guess I appreciate it a little-"

"-it's just like... Rent."

"-Yeah you know what, it's rent it's rent." Techno babbled, "It's an obligation really, it's payment."

**_Technosoft_** ** _!_** ** _Tsundereblade_** ** _!_** ** _Awww_** ** _, This is cute! E e e Techno Soft Techno Soft!_** Chat, who'd been strangely quiet during all this, rose up in volume, and he did NOT appreciate their contribution. He was trying to play this cool!

"Yeah," Ranboo agreed, "It's just rent for letting me live in the underworld."

Techno nodded his head, "Of course Of course."

"It's uh..." Ranboo tilted his head, for once looking up at Techno on his perch, "It's actually got a uh... A thing on it."

Techno blinked down at him, before raising an eyebrow, "That doesn't sound good Ranboo."

Ranboo chuckled, "I know-"

"Did you like... Curse it or something?"

"Well, you _could_ call it that..."

"Bro if this axe tries to kill me in my sleep I'm evicting you."

A genuine grin split Ranboo's face and Techno felt relieved that the conversation had been thoroughly diverted.

"No no no nothing like that," Ranboo shook his head, "just... Ok, try and throw it as far as you can."

"...heh?"

"Yeah! Throw it!" Ranboo encouraged, gesturing at a mountain in the distance.

Technoblade raised an eyebrow at him, but decided to humor him. He took the axe in one hand, raised it above his head, took aim, and threw it with all his might.

The axe spun through the air, out of view in an instant. He followed it's course, watching as it landed on a distant snowbank. It had gone several mountains to the left of where he had intended, but he was out of practice.

Ranboo blinked, seeming surprised at the distance, before shaking himself out of it, "Wow uh... Right. Anyways uh...."

"I think I just lost your gift Ranboo." Techno told him, deadpanned.

Ranboo shook his head, "No, no just.... Give it a minute..."

Once again, Techno decided to humor him. He crossed his arms and looked to where the axe had landed. It looked like it caused an avalanche.

After a moment more, Techno shook his head, "Ranboo, I don't think that axe is coming ba-"

He was interrupted as a flurry of particles materialized in front of him. When they cleared, the axe was there, seeming to be floating in midair. It glowed a faint cyan.

" _Heh?!_ "

"Ah, there it is!" Ranboo sounded pleased at its appearance.

Techno stared at it for a moment before reaching out and grabbing it by the handle. He glanced from the axe to Ranboo, then Ranboo to the axe.

"I uh... Found a way to make it teleport." Ranboo explained, "Just a bit."

Once again, Technoblade found himself lost for words. He found himself staring down at the axe, who's glow had faded. He had many questions. The main ones were _How_ and _Why_.

Techno was glad it was Ranboo who spoke up first, "Anyways, uh.... I gotta get going. I've got a map to a woodland mansion I gotta find..."

Techno, shaken from his bewilderment, allowed himself to be distracted from the axe.

"You know where a mansion is?" Those were rare. Woodland mansions were usually filled with cultists, people who wanted to try and become gods, or kill gods, depending on the cult. The members of those cults experimented a lot with escaping death and gaining immortality, something that bugged Phil, but could have some very valuable resources, even for gods.

Techno should know, he'd used something from there to escape Quackity.

"Uh, yeah." Ranboo replied, taking out the map in question, "It's not the one you found, it's in the complete opposite direction."

"Can I see?"

"Sure."

Techno took the map. Sure enough it was a different woodland mansion. One hopefully still stocked with supplies....

"Do... You wanna come?" Ranboo tilted his head, "We can split the loot."

Techno glanced up at Ranboo, considering the offer. On one hand, it would be a long trip and they'd have a fight on their hands at the end.... On the other there would be a good reward. It would be better than doing chores all day.

~~_H_ _e could test out his new axe!_ ~~

"Ya know what? Sure."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Techno may be getting attached. Just a bit. No one tell him tho.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! Let me know if I messed up anything with spelling/formatting/grammar!


	3. Do Not Blow Up The House Of A God, Please

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Philza leaves the door open. Panic ensues.

The mansion burned a bright firey red. Against the night sky, it almost looked like a sunrise... If a sunrise had collapsing banisters, flaming monsters, and crumbling floors. Which it didn't, but it was still fun to imagine.

Ranboo paused at that thought. It had been awhile since he had done something fun. L'manburg had been one giant web of politics, rules, and deadlines. The more Ranboo had gotten caught up in the L'manburg pantheon, the less fun he had. In the days leading up to Doomsday, he had been absolutely miserable.

He didn't understand how Tubbo managed all of that stress... And now he was grateful he never would have to understand.

Surprisingly it hadn't been War who started this fire, though he had certainly laughed as he ran away. Instead Ranboo had been the one to light a torch and send it into the wool statue. The result was now crumbling and burning before them. It was strangely freeing.

"Are you the god of arson or something?" Technoblade had asked with a laugh.

Ranboo had grinned back, "Oh yes, absolutely."

* * *

Ranboo was afraid of War still, both of them. He had never talked with Dream, and he intended on keeping it that way, but Wa-Techno was a bit of a different case. It still took some getting used to, calling them by their names.

He used to be mortal at one point, and it had been drilled into his head that to call a god by their name would be to attract their attention. No one wanted to attract the attention of War or Death. They spoke of them by their domain only. It was safer that way, better.

Now that Ranboo was a god himself, he knew it wasn't entirely untrue. It was like having a slight tug at the back of your mind. Names held power, but it wasn't a 'say it and you'll die' situation.

It still scares Ranboo to even think of Techno's name. A paranoid fear that War could hear his thoughts, even though he knew that was ridiculous.

The next couple weeks helped calm that fear. The Underworld wasn't a bustling city crammed with people, it was quiet, save for the winds that occasionally blew in light snow, and Ranboo could see the sky clearly. It was strange too, trees curving and bending in strange ways, islands of ice and earth floating through the sky, blue and white fire that should feel warm. The snow didn't burn here either.

He kept his journals close to him at all times. Even now, with no apparent threat, he constantly checked the pages, going through each one meticulously to make sure it hasn't be altered. It was hard to tell, seeing as he couldn't remember what exactly he had written down, but it didn't feel like anything was out of place....

He hoped so at least.

The smile still haunts him. It shouldn't, but it does. Its just two dots and a curved line. It should mean nothing to him...

" _Ranboo_ _is a traitor!_ "

It meant a lot of things. It meant his books were no longer safe. It meant that somehow Dream had gotten his hands on Ranboo's symbol. He had taken it and replaced it with a false one, all without Ranboo noticing.

~~It meant Ranboo couldn't trust himself.~~

A god's symbol was important. It could be objects or animals that they put a bit of their magic into, a bit of their domain. Tommy had been the first god to make a symbol. The Disks. A symbol is tied to a God. In the wrong hands it can be used to manipulate and pull away some of their powers, make them more mortal. Make them weaker.

So how come Ranboo hadn't noticed that Dream had his book?

" _You gave it to him._ " A voice, once Ranboo didn't want to hear, echoed in the back of his mind, " _And he gave you back a false one._ "

Ranboo was lucky he wasn't in his panic room. Something about the Underworld made it easier to shake off the voice. Shake off that feeling of unease and constant questioning, forget about it until later.

~~He didn't want to remember that.~~

~~The voice had spun off the black box's walls, ringing in Ranboo's ears. It told him things he didn't want to hear, but as he scoured through his memories, he had faint memories of it. Of a smiling mask, of words he couldn't quite recall... All while he teetered on the edge of sanity.~~

~~He had rushed home and worked his fingers through the earth. He had searched and searched until he found it. Something warm, something powerful, something treacherous.~~

It was easier to distract himself with other thoughts.

Philza had finally returned to the underworld two weeks after he had left it. From what Ranboo remembered it wasn't unusual, the God of Death was seen a lot on the surface nowadays. He came back with an influx of souls following him, old, young, tired, scared, the souls were so very different from one another. Ranboo had to wonder if Philza had picked them up along the way, or if he added a soul or two to that pile. You never knew with him.

Philza had given Ranboo a tired smile and wave before he had walked into the house. He must really be exhausted because he left the door open behind him. The spirits trailed after him, stopping at the stairs to the porch. They transparent spirits huddled around the entrance, speaking to each other in hushed voices. A few wandered off, heading towards the soulfire camps, thinning the herd some.

Ranboo busied himself with other things. He had found that, while quiet down here, it could be awfully boring at times. So he polished his tools, found rope for the animals he had brought down from the surface, reread his memory book-

~~You blew up the Temple, you had one of THE disks :)~~

-Ok maybe not that.

Perhaps it was this that caused him to not notice the monster coming out of the thick, endless trees. Maybe being so distracted with his thoughts caused him to not see as the green thing climbed up the stairs to War's house. He certainly wasn't aware of it slipping inside the open doorway.

**BOOM** **!**

Ranboo did notice the explosion though. That was kinda hard to miss.

His head whipped around and, to his amazement, he could see the insides of War's house. The wall had been blown open as had half the floor. He could see a lot of damage to the inside as well.

"OH SHIT!"

The cry came from Philza, and Ranboo scrambled to grab his sword and armor. He stumbled, tripping over himself once, before finally getting it all on and rushing out to help Phil with... Whatever just happened.

He found the god of Death stuffing things into chests and rapidly trying to build walls out of the broken pieces. There was shattered glass on the lawn, splinters everywhere.

"What happened?"

Phil looked on the verge of a hysterical fit, laughing and frantically shoving items into chests, "Don't ask it's fine! It's fine!"

Ranboo glanced around them, "This-This doesn't seem fine."

"Nooooope. Nope nope nope this is fine don't even worry!" Phil broke down into a fit of manic giggles, "Nope totally fine! Aaaahhh!"

"Ok what happened though?"

"Fucking- I left the door open for one second and a creeper-"

"Creeper?"

"-monster thing- Blew up my ass and the dogs ran off and- Ranboo." Philza grabbed one of the other's shoulders, eyes gleaming with realization, "Fucking... Techno's coming back in an hour."

Something like panic sunk into Ranboo's stomach. His eyes widened and he let out a small, choked, "O-oh."

They were absolutely screwed.

Phil let go of him and scrambled back to picking up the pieces, "Well??? Don't just stand there! Help!!!"

They worked as fast as inhumanly possible. Philza managed to find the plans for the house and rebuild it using what he could find in the chests (luckily they were more organized than Ranboo's) and Ranboo fixed up the items and replaced them when they were too broken to be used. Ranboo's heart pounded, even as he chuckled along to Phil's wheezing laughter.

The art caused them the most problem. Techno had three huge collages pasted on his walls, each made on the backsides of maps. All three had been caught in the blast radius. Luckily they still had their pieces in tact but....

"It just says map!" Ranboo stared in bewilderment at the scrawled writing on the corner of the page.

Phil doubled over in wheezing laughter, another paper in his hand, "It just says map! That's no fucking help! That's no fucking help at all!"

Some of the maps were ordered, but most weren't, which was the frustrating bit. It was like putting together a puzzle, but instead of one puzzle, it was three mixed into a box and dumped onto the floor. The fact that some spirits had surrounded them and were laughing at their plight was _not_ helping!

"Just fucking....throw them in different piles we'll figure it out later!" Phil said, tossing Ranboo the papers he had and turning to fix the doorway, which had no doors.

Somehow, despite _literally everything_ going wrong that could possibly go wrong, they managed to fix the house before Technoblade came home. It looked like no one had touched anything, save for a few stray items wrongly sorted into chests and a bit of magic to hold everything together. All the shrapnel outside had been cleared up made to look like the snow hadn't been disturbed.

War walked into the basement only minutes after Phil and Ranboo had finished, dogs behind him. They were both down there, taking a break from the stress and pretending that the house hadn't been blown up an hour prior. Perhaps it was just Ranboo's paranoia, but he could have sworn Techno was acting unusually chipper. Phil had the biggest grin on his face and Ranboo could tell he was trying desperately not to laugh.

Besides that, however, Technoblade didn't get suspicious. He'd bought the lie about Philza accidentally letting out the dogs and he didn't note anything wrong with the house or the art. Maybe they had gotten away with it!

"Why does it smell like smoke in here?"

..... Never mind Ranboo was definitely getting evicted.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I... Dont know if the 'blowing up Techno's house' is canon or not but I'm keeping it. If it wasn't canon in canon, it's canon here! Plus, it lets me write Philza from a guided standpoint.
> 
> They may be gods, but their houses are still vulnerable to explosions. Shut the door Phil!

**Author's Note:**

> I cannot find any grammatical/spelling errors for the life of me, but PLEASE let me know if you find them. I am so blind when it comes to these things. I am writing this in the note app on my phone so..... Yeah I'm liable to forget stuff.
> 
> Hope you enjoyed!


End file.
